"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it."
Oscar Wilde
Welcome to Imagination Temptation, a place where rants of a girl and the overwhelming feelings of her lays here.
All of the words implied here are genuinely from inside her mind or heart, though there are no guarantee that everything in here were just her imagination or fantasy.
Shall you see further inside this place, just click the girls on the left.
Profile
Who am I?
Certainly no one.
Well, I am just a being who likes to imagine a lot. It even tempts me.
An author of its life. A human who likes to and being loved.
Who doesn't, after all? Blasphemy, I say, if you don't need to be love and loved.
I like simplicity yet complexity. I like modest things yet also I like challenges.
I hate apathetic people. I hate selfish people. I hate ignorant people.
I love stories from the girl in the attic. I love songs that sings out feelings.
I don't like cliche love songs. Suffice to say, I don't like most of the songs in the world?
Hey, do you want to know more? Are you listening to me?
Here I am, back in the lair that I've been abandoning. I guess I don't feel too lonely anymore to write shits and rants on this place. Am I right?
You are a past, an entire past that I must no look for, but everytime I see you, I can't help but to laugh. Was I really this desperate? I asked myself. Although at the same time, I would look to pity myself. I am truly a despicable and lame person. Really lame. Too lame. So sad it is.
You know, I'm not in love again.
Part of me still hopes that someday I can be by his side, to comfort him when he's down, to heal him from his pain, to make him laugh, to be a shoulder when he needs one to cry, to be someone he can turn to, to be a person he could trust, and to be forever with him till the end of our lifes.
But here I am, realizing that I was a true foolish back then, and maybe, there's no way I could be his, or him be mine. We are too different and I was harsh, sentimental, childish, selfish. Yet he is...
I want to reach him, but I can't. I couldn't. Yes, I couldn't and I realize it. Maybe he's not the one for me. That's it. That's it.
But I want to be in love again.
With who?
I don't want to trap myself into thinking that I really like a guy. It was what I was doing with the white butterfly and the black butterfly. I realized that I made myself to like them, not that I really like them myself. It's funny yet I was truly a fool back then.
I want to be in love again, but I am afraid. I am always afraid of rejection. I am always afraid of losing something. I want to be in love again but I'm afraid that I will be envious, filled by jealousy that I could never spill. I could never give for anyone. In the end, I was afraid to be in a relationship, afraid to be with someone and afraid that I will be an evil once I get someone.
I love seeing women in their wedding dresses and mothers hugging their children. Was it because I long for one? But could never be one of have one.
I am truly, a pitiful person. Pathetic.
Yesterday, the white butterfly came to me. He asked me how to draw a realistic hair. Turns out he was drawing for a girl. I laughed at myself. I don't feel anything, yet I feel lonely somehow.
Maybe, just maybe. There's is someone, but I haven't meet him just yet.
